Say hi! to the super-mom behind one of the most amazingly successful parenting blogs in India –Mummasaurus.
Mrs.Prisha Lalwani is a mom of twin boys whose musings and parental experiments enliven her blog everyday. She is formerly a psychologist and is currently a renowned blogger and graphology enthusiast. I’m pleased and honored to have her as the star guest of this article. The Q&A session of the rendezvous is posted below:
1. What was your first reaction when you were scanned with twins?
It is a funny story. I had gone to Mumbai because my co-sister was about to deliver a baby. We were planning for one then. And when the usual question “When are we going to hear the good news from you?” was asked, I, with eyes full of gleam replied, “I would like to have twins!“. The mere thought of having two bundles of joy at the same time fascinated me.
Within a month, I realized I was pregnant and we went to the hospital to confirm with a scan in the other week that followed. During the first appointment, the doctor informed us that there was a cyst along with the embryo I carried. Anxiety and fear took a toll on our happiness but it didn’t last for long. In the sixth week ultrasound, the doctor confirmed that I was carrying twins. Apparently in the previous appointment, she had mistaken one of the babies for cyst. The exact moment of realizing my twin pregnancy was more like a dream come true for me. I never knew that “Ask and it shall be given” would really work in life, but it did! I came out of the room eye-popped in surprise, ecstasy and what not.
2. Who/what inspired you to start the Mummasaurus blog?
I had been working as a content writer for the past three years and contributed humorous articles to one of the leading online parenting platforms. Gradually, my niche as a writer got established. That was when some of my friends suggested me to start a blog. I had always thought of blogging as just a hobby and not worthy to tagged as a career. When my friends enlightened me with the flourishing opportunities in the world of blogging, I stepped in without giving it a second thought. And I named my blog Mummasaurus because I wanted it to be a one word that is quirky, funny and relates to who I really am – a ferocious mom of boys who love dinosaurs. Mummasaurus came to me as an epiphany indeed and pretty much fell into place.
3. They say having twin kids at home will double the giggles, grins and trouble too. Do you agree?
Well, to be frank, it is not double but multifold! 1 +1 = 2 is true only in Mathematics. When it comes to managing two children, it is not additionally difficult but exponentially challenging. Many of you may think that if one child breaks a toy, the other one breaks another. Kids don’t do that. If one breaks a toy, together they mutilate the entire room! On a positive note, when you get kisses, you do not get just 4 or 5, but a minimum of forty or fifty kisses get planted onto your temple and cheeks, all at a time 😀 So, “double the trouble, double the fun” is an outdated statement now, according to me.
4. Have you ever experienced mom guilt while parenting?
Mom guilt is like part of my routine in life. I deal with it all day, every day. There have been times when I used to yell at my kids for no big reason. I am a very busy person by profession who juggles too many responsibilities in hand. Most often, I lose my sanity while pleading the kids to eat properly. But after four years of parenting, I realize that happy kids are far more important than kids who eat spinach and kale out of parental pressure or kids who are indefinitely restricted the access to TV for life. As long as you do not harm the child, I feel that it is okay to let go of certain restrictions that we simply do based on the references from books.
5. What is your guilty pleasure when you take a break from work and life?
My guilty pleasure is to soak myself in a bubbling bathtub and stay there for hours like a manatee 😉 I also love to satiate myself with desserts that aren’t too sweet, accompanied by, maybe a drink or two.
6. Who is your mom coach?
My mom coach is my mother, of course. My husband too to some extent and MIL as well.
I also surf the Internet to read a lot of information about positively parenting the twins. I can say that I am a wise consumer of the web as I always verify the information thoroughly before applying any of them in real life. There is an online magazine (which also has a Facebook community) named Twiniversity which I have been relying on since pregnancy.
7. Do you read books?
I am a pathetic, sore reader. I CANNOT read! Even when I browse for information, I often binge read the pages. It is because I feel that while reading too much, my personal style of thinking and writing gets influenced.
8. Your two cents on the importance of breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is very important like everybody says. But it is not the end of the world. Being the mom of twins, I couldn’t breastfeed even one of them properly due to health issues and lack of support from doctors and lactation consultants in the initial days of my parenting journey. These days, mothers who do not breastfeed for undeniable reasons are ruthlessly judged by others who do. I am against it. My recommendation is to breastfeed your child as long as you can if you have proper support from your doctor, family and friends. If you cannot, that’s okay too and you don’t have to kill yourself over it. Stick to breast milk or formula milk till six months and please do not introduce cow’s milk until your baby’s first birthday.
9. What is the biggest challenge you have faced as a mom?
There is no specific challenge that is too big to be picked up and explained. Basically, all the parenting challenges are real and humongous, most of them you cannot easily deal with. My pregnancy phase was itself so painful, I was constantly on bed rest and wasn’t even allowed to sit. I saw the outside world only when the doctor’s appointment was on. This struggle subsided when the babies were out, giving rise to a whole new set of challenges to deal with – how to hold them, feed them, pacify them when they cry at the same time, the list goes on. This applies not just for mom of twins, but for every mother who takes care of their child at home. Our lives are always adventurous. Always.
10. Do you go for a particular brand when you shop for your baby/toddler care essentials?
I am not very brand conscious when I shop for my children. I like to verify stuff before trying it on the kids. In fact, I don’t like to spend too much on things that my children use or play with, because they outgrow the phase very soon. I’d rather invest that money in giving them better life experiences instead.
11. What are your short term and long term goals in parenting?
One of my kids is struggling to get used to cursive writing in English. So my short term goal is to help him cope with that, build interest in the same and explain as to why cursive writing is crucial for life, which I myself am not very sure of :D. My long term goal is to continue being friends with my children. I think I really want to be their comfort zone for life. When I was a child, I used to take my mom for granted and I hope my children don’t do that to me. I would like to be there for them as long as possible.
12. Have you ever sub-consciously compared the potential of your twin kids? If yes, has it ever affected the way you nurture them?
I started off by telling myself that I will never ever compare my twin children. They are very different people and that is how they are supposed to be. But yes, consciously or not, you’ll end up comparing them. I have promised myself that I will never tell them “See, A has done this, so you should also do this” or “See, B is behaving this way, so you should behave the same way” because I do not want them to compete with each other. But as they grew up, I understood that a healthy competition helps both of them to achieve better. For instance, when one of my kids help me pick up the toys, I encourage the other to help his brother. But I keep a rigid check on the fact that they don’t end up despising each other or feel left out.
13. Do you adopt any specific parenting style?
My parenting style doesn’t fit into a particular category you find in books. I don’t think anyone has a book-specific parenting style. Everyone does a mix and match of experiments that work according to the situation they encounter. Different things work on different days. There have been days when I end up lecturing the boys for hours, sometimes I cajole them to get things done, there were also days when I just had to let go of certain rules and simply get into the dirty puddle of mud with them.
14. What is your mantra to stay happy in life?
Do whatever it takes to keep yourself happy. Everyone around you needs and deserves to live with the best version of you. It matters a lot.
15. Brag time! Share an incident that made you feel oh..so..proud of your twin darlings?
They love me beyond, above and over everything and everyone else. That’s my brag moment with my twins. I couldn’t have asked for more.
16. A message for your mom followers.
My mom followers make me who I am. A lot of days I’m low and not really getting through my day, but then I get a random shoutout, a funny comment, or a reply on my story and believe me, it changes my day. There are so sooo many days when I am overwhelmed by motherhood, by work, feeling lost, lonely and upset with life in general… But one single message makes me feel like I am making a difference in their life, like someone felt happy because of me, I made them smile through their shitty day and that, means the world to me. Thank you for following me, for talking to me, for liking my posts and dropping in your comments. It is very encouraging and fulfilling 😊
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